Something has to change

Something has to change!
The story women grow up with has to change.
The tragedy of learning other women,
who I adore and admire,
also loathe themselves
is heartbreaking.

My wise and beautiful friend
admonishes me for talking harshly about myself
yet she too suffers from an internal battle with herself.
Another vibrant, radiant, sexy friend also
loathes herself.
Always has.
She’s intelligent, courageous and nurturing
but hates herself.

How the fuck does the world go around when half the population
privately can’t stand themselves,
don’t feel enough,
feel they don’t measure up.

Not enough for who?
Measure up to what?

What’s going on here?

This shit has to change.

Now!

It’s time to reclaim our sovereignty my beautiful women friends.
It’s time to embrace ourselves as we do our lovers and children.
It’s time to become embodied sovereign women,
for ourselves
and the sake of our fellow sisters and our daughters.

I realise the big question is “How?”
I don’t have the answer right now
But I know there is an answer.
It won’t happen overnight but each small action toward:
accepting ourselves,
challenging societal rules, about age and body image,
saying no to the constraints placed upon us,
choosing how we use our bodies,
not accepting the crap we’re told by western medicine about our bodies
are part of the answer.

I think it’s also about ending the “good girl” behaviour and
choosing to express ourselves when and how we want.
It’s about asking for what we want,
walking away from what we don’t.
It’s about learning to be comfortable in our skin and not comparing ourselves.
And you know what,
I think it’s about starting to see other women,
not as enemies, but allies.
It’s about seeing the good and the beautiful in the women around us.
Recognising another woman’s gifts does not diminish our own,
it strengthens us,
unites us and brings us back to ourselves.
Strong women don’t compete with each other
or tear each other down.
Embodied women support each other,
are generous with other women,
are generous and loving toward themselves.

It’s time to reclaim our sovereignty my beautiful women friends.
It’s time to embrace ourselves as we do our lovers and children.
It’s time to become embodied sovereign women.

Let’s do this.
Let’s get this show on the road.
Let’s transform and be rad as fuck!

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Are your stories holding back a wave of change?

There are watchers in this world and there are doers. And the watchers sit around watching the doers, do.
Barefoot in the Park

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My son recently took part in the 40 hour famine, a weekend fast to raise money for families in third world countries. I was intrigued by the reaction he received from friends and acquaintances. Most were really supportive, none took up his challenge to join him but what surprised me the most were those who commented that they’d die if they gave up food for forty hours. Some claimed they couldn’t give up food for several hours and then there was the poor soul who unashamedly remarked that  they couldn’t possibly give up their chips and gravy on a Friday night.

On the final day of the challenge my community minded son volunteered to cook breakfast at a local fun run. Again, the comments and reactions of others intrigued me. Many, of course, were supportive yet questioned his sanity in cooking bacon and eggs for others while fasting himself. But the number of detractors surprised me. Yes, yes, I’m sure it was all in jest but a mother does always want to protect her young. One cocky fellow posted on social media that he’d seen my son tucking into a bacon and egg burger and labelled his efforts as a ‘massive fail’. Oh, I was irate (protective mother hen coming out). I fumed and fumed, wondering if I could address this flippant fellow in a firm but gentle way. I was saved the trouble when he was publicly corrected by another.

I digress.

My interest was piqued by the thinking behind the conversations that arose from this event. I began to ponder the stories we tell ourselves and the implications they have on our society.

I have concluded that some of us tell ourselves we couldn’t possibly do without things, or give up a tradition or change a habit because, perhaps, it’s easier not to. Some of us cut others down who do things we aren’t brave enough to do. Then there are those who gladly and wholeheartedly support others in their quests. These people fall into two categories: those happy to cheer others on while remaining in their comfort zones and those who cheer while pursuing their own challenges alongside them.

I see this played out in the community and the world. We pass things by, overlook issues and justify our inaction safe in the knowledge that others will take up the torch and do the work for us. We are relieved from our duty by the heroes in the world.

Alone, our heroes make a difference in the world, they get things done but their efforts are akin to a splash in the ocean, whereas, if we all pitched in and got involved we could create a wave of change in the world.

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With this in mind I asked myself these questions:

What are my stories and how are they holding me back from making a change I’d like to see in my life and the world?

What will it take to step outside my comfort zone, to put myself on the line, to contribute to a wave of change?

What are your thoughts?
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